An innocent beginning

It all started so innocently. A little conversation based on a little question leading to something big. This past weekend at Geiger's staff holiday party a colleague asked if I had brought anyone as a date. No. At this time in my life there is no one to bring, but I do await the day when I will have someone to discuss and debrief with on the drive home. Well, Jo found my current status absolutely appallingand turned immediately to our principal, Paula, who was in the kitchen with us. Paula was giddy and said, "I wanted to talk with you about that! Now that I have permission I'm going to find you a guy! Just you wait." Chuckling she says, "Oh... this is going to be good!"

This evening I poked my head into my principals office to see if she had a moment to talk about phone call I had with a parent. She was on the phone, but took the time to talk with me. It was as if she saw my mouth moving but created her own dialogue because in response to what I said she talked back into the phone and said, "Hey, Brian, (her nephew) you know who I'm talking to? This really hot, smart, well traveled, artistic, amazing teacher. Do you know of any of your friends who are single?" Then she continued on for a good solid couple of minutes about my qualifications. Well, I take that back. She would pause for a second to ask me questions. "What's your type?" "When did you graduate?" "Blond or blue haired, I mean eyes?" "How young are you willing to date?" I would stumbled around for an answer all the while thinking.... can this really be? She never really waited for an answer. She took the liberty to translate my gawking and nervous giggles.

Brian was doing his own talking on the other end of the line. I couldn't hear what he was saying but from her answers I have a pretty good idea. "PLU." "Hot" "She thought you were hot." "No, he needs to be smart." "Artistic and athletic" "She's lived in Africa and Australia." "What are you a sicko, 18 is WAY to young!" " Yeah, like an 18 year old would think she is hot." And I'm wanting to sink into the floor, run far far away, and burst into hysterical laughter all at the same time. Instead I stood there dumbfounded. Could this really be happening? Who does this? What have I gotten myself into?

It gets even better.

With some perimeters laid she and Brian start to rattle off names of guys they mutually know. While she is talking at the same time she begins to open her facebook account, she goes to her friends list and types in a name to find a picture of a guy who would be just perfect for me. She shows me various pictures of him. Tells me his life story starting with his fathers' occupation, his jaw surgery and how he had to drink only liquids for two years of his life when the surgery went bad.

I'm flattered Paula thinks so highly of me and can so easily brag about my qualifications, but it's just hilarious to think about how my good intentions to keep her in the loop on my students turned into a speed dating session. I've also never worked for someone who can so easily blur the line between professionalism and personal life. I sort of like it, it catches me off guard constantly. Definately keeps me on my toes and is giving me plenty of good material if I ever write a sitcome about the life of a teacher.

Often my friend Kathy and I joke about creating a sitcom like The Office based on the lives of teachers. We've already talked about scenes in the staffroom. With really healthy teachers who dream about going to New York to visit the famous Moosewood Cafe. About the conversations around what that teacher pulls out of their lunch bag. And the quizzical looks and questions other teachers have about what's being eaten. I can't wait to tell her about the most recent scene. I think it will get some laughs. We'll have to store it away in our resources of good ideas because it's definitely laugh worthy. Yet at the same time it's actually my real life.